16 MINUTE READ

From Luke’s Journal March 2026  |  Vol. 31  No. 1  |  God at the Bedside

PICTURE THIS: you arrive at work and sit in the staff room – the chair looks like it’s seen better days. You take a moment and scan the room. Collectively, your colleagues exude the vibe of ‘the lights are on, but no one is home.’ Maybe an occasional soft and tired hello is heard. More than half the room has their eyes glued on their mobile devices, scrolling away at mindless entertainment with devices resembling hearing aids in both ears.

Suddenly, an exhausted-looking nurse-in-charge from the previous shift enters the room and tells a story of how the shift went in a monotonous tone. Handover is complete. Congratulations!

You just managed to swallow an enormous amount of information about a few strangers, their endless medical histories, along with their current presenting health concerns… even though you probably do not recall what you had for dinner last night.

Your fatigued brain, left and right hemispheres, is trying to process the day ahead: endless tasks, potential behavioural risks, unhappy and dissatisfied patients, and possibly a barrage of complaints and questions to follow.

All that will come knocking, nay, I should say, ‘self-invited’, barging through your front door.

Don’t forget that coffee in your hand, its aroma, barely anchoring you to reality.

Somewhere in between, you have unconsciously let out a silent sigh or two. You have already identified some medication errors, and let’s be honest, no one wants report on that! The nurse-in-charge gives a final summary – a reminder of your main responsibilities and what the day will look like, before everyone disperses to their allocated patients.

You have just made a mental five-minute list of ‘to-do’ items on a checklist that never seems to end.

The warmth from your coffee has diminished. Your nose informs you of a possible continence aid that has not been tended to for millennia. At a glance, the hallway is in a sordid state. Hazards in each corner, or what we nurses label ‘potential risks’.

Dirty linens stacked in overflowing laundry trolleys, used venepuncture needles stuffed in overfilled sharps containers, IV lines still attached to empty fluid bags, and the list goes on!

Perhaps, we are already immune to this chaotic environment.

From your peripheral view, a patient who is wobbly on their legs pokes their head out of their room, trying to catch your attention, forsaking their mobility aid. You whisper to yourself, “Please DO NOT FALL.”

The equipment that you will need in five minutes is not fully restocked, or worse, nowhere to be found! Already, a few patients’ call bells appear on the wall, requiring a nurse’s attention – not to mention the ridiculously loud alarms of infusion pumps blaring away down the hallway! From a distance, you also hear a distressed patient calling out for help.

To add more stimuli, you just received your first task from a doctor – one of your patients needs immediate attention. Then another message, this time from radiology, requesting another patient to be brought down for a barrage of investigative scans. Oh, don’t forget about the admission from ED that is arriving soon!

Let’s not forget about the looming possibility of phone calls from families. It is called the ‘quest for medical updates’. You can’t help but stare at the clock and the exit door… Relatable? Anyone? I bet!

Though you are fortunate if you did not start your shift with a MET call (Medical Emergency Team) on any of your patients.

Take a moment to internalise everything… breathe and start.

Dear reader, was that an eyeful? Did all that happen in an hour?

Unfortunately, this often occurs in just thirty minutes or less. At times I ask, “God, where and how are you in all this?”

Remembering my student nurse years, cramming all the learning on the fundamentals of nursing into my brain in the classroom days, semester after semester — sometimes I pondered if I had made the right decision in choosing nursing as a career. Would I ever be good enough? How could I make an everlasting impression? At times, my mind would drift and conjure up scenarios of how God would even use me in the workplace to the point of exaggeration and self-pride!

God, how do you fit in this area of my life? Actually, how do I fit into Your grand plan?

I finally received that expensive degree paper that qualified me, a round of applause, and a registration record proving that I was now officially able to practice as a Registered Nurse.

“What was next? Go save the world? Find a job? Where do I even start? To be honest, I felt overwhelmed and a little unsure of what to do or where to go.”

What was next? Go save the world? Find a job? Where do I even start? To be honest, I felt overwhelmed and a little unsure of what to do or where to go.

Did I subconsciously want to achieve great things like Mother Teresa? Emulate Florence Nightingale? Absurd! These were the wild thoughts of an ignorant and naïve young nurse.

Snap out of it, Charity! I found myself in front of my computer, asking the Holy Spirit to help me take my first step in nursing. I started typing out a prayer on a Word document called “Prayer Menu.” Sounds cheesy, right? Believe it or not, I still have that on file… here’s a picture.

I remember job searching. Those two words on their own carry the weight of pressure and anxiety, but when put together, they’re nerve-wracking.

Suddenly, I had to learn how to present at job interviews, explain my competencies, and elaborate on what I could possibly contribute to the nursing workforce. Maybe only then could I secure my prospect as a nurse at the bedside. I remember sending countless resumes and praying that the ‘right door’ would fling wide for me. Somebody, please, pick me!

Fresh out of university, with barely any real-time experience as a nurse, most of my clinical experiences were spent on mannequins in a simulation room. It’s where educators observe your every move, marking off on a sheet of paper to check if you were safe and competent in your nursing practice.

Job experience? Ridiculous! I had not handled a real sickly human by myself; I was shielded and guided by people whom they refer to as Clinical Preceptors (they are an amazing breed). All I knew then was to ensure that my patients were kept alive and safe and that I would survive at the end of the day.

Finding your feet and groove in new experiences or challenging environments is mind-boggling for most of us. There is no definitive manual or guideline for them. There is a saying amongst nurses, “Fake it till you make it.” I wonder how much of this is true.

I know I had to fumble around at times and learn quickly to stand on my own. I was jobless for nearly a year. I was scared and desperate. I asked God countless times: “Lead me to only where You want me to be.” That simple statement in itself can be daunting.

“Then, a door opened. And so, it began. No one could have ever prepared me fully for this career called NURSING.”

Then, a door opened. And so, it began. No one could have ever prepared me fully for this career called NURSING.

There are 3 key memorable encounters in my nursing career. Each helped in shaping my understanding of how God was at the bedside (I am still a student of His ways, Amen). Each encounter was humbling, and all equally testify to the goodness of God.

We are often told to, “Bite the bullet and soldier on,” leaving little to or no room for reflection, or time to mull things over, celebrate or sometimes grieve properly and healthily. I still have many unanswered questions; however, there is a deep peace within that can only come from Jesus.

Encounter 1: THEN – Graduate Year – Aged Care

APPROXIMATELY 9 YEARS AGO: Like any other ordinary day, I was organising my residents’ charts. Oddly, I came across one folder with no signed DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) form. Usually, that form is completed on admission.

Shortly after, I received a call from the facility’s doctor directing me to call for an ambulance for that same resident – her blood results were worrisome. Just after calling for the ambulance, a trusted nursing assistant frantically urged me to dash to the resident’s room, as she was “not looking very good.”

I burst into the room and found her slumped on the bed. I rang the ambulance again.

With the emergency operator giving me instructions on loudspeaker, I found myself on her chest, doing compressions! My mind went absolutely blank. Adrenaline kicked in. Even to this day, I can still hear that distinctive sound of bones being snapped like twigs as I applied force to her chest. Her eyes were wide open, staring into space. Her pupils became fixed and dilated.

“Once directed by emergency services to stop compressions, I left the room, hyperventilating. Uncontrollable shaking came over me. I went numb and stiff (yes, I went into shock).“

Once directed by emergency services to stop compressions, I left the room, hyperventilating. Uncontrollable shaking came over me. I went numb and stiff (yes, I went into shock). Time stood still.

I thought to myself: Where did it all go wrong? Did I miss something? I did what I could, right? She was fine earlier in the day. God, why? I remember the calmness of a senior fire brigade officer who helped me process the aftermath. Thank God for him. You never forget your first death, he said… It’s true.

How was God at the bedside in this case? This was my first experience of a traumatic death. Up till then, I had only ever heard people talking about it. It’s entirely different when you experience it first-hand.

I had to seek my own answers to questions like: Why did it happen the way it did? Why did God not bring her back to life? Perhaps God knew that I had to be exposed for growth before my graduate nurse chapter came to an end? Even when the outcome was undesirable, I am confident that He was there.

Looking back, I found solace knowing that God had placed the necessary people around me on that day to safeguard me when I least expected it. His ways are higher than mine. Was it a coincidence: from the folder document to the doctor’s call, to the frantic call for help? I don’t think so.

Encounter 2: NOW – Hospital

I briefly met a young palliative Christian lady battling with end-stage cancer. The ward was busier than usual. Her continuous pain relief pump needed replenishing. She was in an isolation room (with no windows!) due to a respiratory viral illness. Sigh.

A palliative nurse educator kindly assisted me with the medication and pump change. Upon entering the room, I was greeted by the patient’s family – along with declarations for miraculous healing and blaring praise and worship songs. The patient, on the other hand, was lying in bed, looking terminal. Pale and swollen all over, in pain and, dare I say, almost lifeless.

“…deep within me, was a sense that she would soon meet with the person whom she calls her Beloved.”

Honestly, it was great to witness the family’s enthusiasm and faith as they believed God for a complete turnaround. However, deep within me, was a sense that she would soon meet with the person whom she calls her Beloved.

Standing by her bedside, I was conflicted. Should I have faith in the miraculous? Or just watch how it unfolds? I did not want to ‘quench’ their faith in that given moment. We are trained to see things as they are, but I worship a living, miracle-working God. How do you marry these together?

I remember quietly asking the Holy Spirit: What is your will in this? It was then that I was prompted to pray for peace. Yes, you read that correctly. Not healing but peace. It was a very sombre moment, but I knew that God was present in that room. The atmosphere in there was intense. Exiting was much welcomed! Talk about the mechanics of ventilation. Pressure indeed.

I learnt from my colleagues a few days later that the patient passed on to glory, and her family had a hard time processing her passing that day. I wondered, how would the family grieve? What were they thinking about God now? I found myself praying for a community of believers to surround them. I remember leaving work that day needing to call a prayer partner to debrief immediately.

“What do you do when your miracle does not happen? When your prayers feel so distant from God’s ears? Were those prayers not good enough?”

What do you do when your miracle does not happen? When your prayers feel so distant from God’s ears? Were those prayers not good enough? Did you lack faith? Did you miss the mark before saying Amen? Are you not His child? Is God still good?

Yes. God is good. God is not a stranger to human suffering. Jesus is very well acquainted with suffering and grief.

“He was despised and rejected by mankind,
 a man of suffering, and familiar with pain.
 Like one from whom people hide their faces
 He was despised, and we held Him in low esteem”.
(Isaiah 53:3)

Encounter 3: NIGHT SHIFT

With the hallway lights turned off, silence descended on the ward. I received a handover of a young lady who just received a devastating diagnosis of cancer. I was informed that she had been ‘low in mood’ all day.

I introduced myself to her and asked if she required anything… mainly pain relief. She softly responded with a flat, “No” and turned to her side. Before leaving, I gave her a routine, gentle reminder that if she needed me, I was a ‘call bell away’. Not long after, a soft sob escaped from the room, then silence.

Towards the end of my shift, I returned for a routine vitals check. She was wide-awake in the dark – music playing on her mobile. I enquired about the music (my poor attempt to start a conversation). She replied, “It’s Christian music, it keeps me calm.” I could only respond with a sad, “Oh, nice.” I asked if she was able to sleep. She said, “No.” Recent events had kept her awake and on edge. Her voice was burdened with worries and hope for a miracle.

Sometimes, I think to myself: What right or capacity do I have to offer someone words of encouragement or comfort to ease or alleviate worries and pain? Especially in a health crisis. Phrases like, “It will be alright”, “You are doing so well”, or worse, “I understand” seem insufficient… irrelevant even.

“So, how does one person really comfort another in their time of real struggle and need?”

So, how does one person really comfort another in their time of real struggle and need? All I could do was to give her a gentle touch on her shoulder and sigh silently.

This is where I believe God is so brilliant! He intervenes in a situation, gets up close and personal. As soon as I bid her goodbye and headed for the door, a thought dropped into my mind, actually more like intruded! It went “Why don’t you pray for her?” (Confession: I try to avoid these a lot). I knew then it was the Holy Spirit.

No surprise, with lightning speed, my human mind wanted to override it. Surely, this is a job I should just breeze through… right? I should just carry on to the next patient; there is a ton of documentation to be done!

See, obedience is key. I left the vital machine at the door and went to her bedside. I knelt and sheepishly whispered a question to her, “May I pray for you?” and she agreed right away! (I was anticipating rejection – talk about courage and faith from this nurse here…).

No eloquent words of a healing crusade preacher were needed. The Lord was in that room. God knew what He was doing. I did not need to know the answers, nor what her outcome might be, but that His will be done.

“What is God showing you or challenging you to do or learn? Are you just going through the motions in your work or actively seeking His face?”

Dear readers, how does God at the bedside look to you? What is God showing you or challenging you to do or learn? Are you just going through the motions in your work or actively seeking His face? The struggle is real, I know.

You may be starting your career, or in the middle of climbing the ranks, or you may well be preparing to say farewell after serving others for a lifetime. Your journey may look more chaotic than mine. Whatever it is, know that in whatever you do, do it unto God.

Those who are willing to follow His leading, God will use mightily! He may call you to something big, or He may just ask you to do something simple like pray. I believe God is championing health care workers to be watchmen on the walls. Those who hear His heart and seek His face. The struggles, frustrations and mundaneness you face at work, He sees it all. He sees you.

I will end with this famous scripture.

“The steps of a good man are ordered by the Lord,
And he delights in his way.”
(Psalm 37:23)

Thank you for reading this crazy long entry!
I pray this will bless you. It was a pleasure and an honour.
Now…coffee anyone? Ha ha…

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